This is not a sob story or for attention, this is my reality and is the reality of many parents who are alienated or part-time. I use the term part-time because we live in a system/society that supports it and even encourages it. I can’t remember a time I was ever offered to have my child on Christmas Day, why because it’s not in the best interest of the other parent!

As long as I pay child support, pay for birthdays and Christmas its win-win for the other parent. I don’t need to be a real part of my child’s life as long as I keep the money rolling in and presents brought that is my sole purpose. Would the other parent think about my being alone at Xmas, hell no as long as they are not alone that is all that matters!

To be honest I have desensitised myself when it comes to Xmas as it is less painful and stressful. It is easier to pretend it is not happening and to rush through it to be over than to get caught up in it. Friends and family know how difficult this time of year is for me but they just don’t get it they just get upset with you because you are not as reliable or as sociable as you used to be.

When your child refers to you as him or he and not dad or daddy it is hard to hear. Then you get photos and videos of what the other parent is doing with your child and you can only sit by on the sideline and watch. It’s hard and very painful to experience and I hope and pray this never happens to you as it really does change you as a person.

I have never ever the night before Xmas prepared milk, cookies/mince pie and a carrot for Santa! I know it sounds very small but to a parent, it’s those small things that really matter. I don’t get to sit and watch Xmas movies and play games with my children. I don’t get to watch panto’s or nativity play’s of my children nor do I get invited too.

What I do look forward to is a cold empty house with no decorations, no children and watching everyone on social media and TV enjoying or pretending to enjoy Xmas. This is my reality every single year and to be honest it probably won’t change. So, excuse me if I don’t feel sociable or

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