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Alzheimer’s Diaries – Navigating the Journey of Caring for My Mother with Alzheimer’s

These past 2-3 months have officially been the most challenging of my life. When I decided to care for my mother, who has Alzheimer’s, I was aware of the difficulties ahead, but the reality has been far more intense. It’s akin to caring for a child who can’t learn, demanding constant repetition, vigilance, and patience. My mother and I have shared a close bond since my childhood, and I’ve witnessed firsthand the trials she’s endured. My goal was to ensure her later years were filled with happiness and tranquillity, allowing her to live out her life in peace.

Unfortunately, many factors beyond my control have hindered this endeavour. There were moments when I should have trusted my instincts. I’ve always prioritised others’ well-being over my own, advocating and protecting my mother since I was young. This responsibility often leads to conflict, especially when others try to take advantage of her condition.

I recently took a much-needed holiday, which turned out to be a complete nightmare. A word of advice: always choose reputable, ABTA-registered companies for travel, not ones like LoveHolidays. This experience taught me the importance of careful planning, especially when caring for someone with Alzheimer’s. No matter how busy or stressed you are, taking the time to organise a Lasting Power of Attorney is crucial. Without it, managing and advocating for your loved one’s care becomes incredibly difficult.

This responsibility should not be handed to just anyone — ensure that it’s either a trusted charity or a solicitor assisting you. Besides this, I’ve been liaising with companies, housing cooperatives, and various entities to secure better support for my mother. We’ve also faced housing disrepair and other challenges, adding to the stress of caregiving. Being a carer is hard work and it changes your life irrevocably. You’ll find yourself watching others live their lives freely while you might feel trapped in your caring role. Yet, at this moment, I wouldn’t have it any other way. My mother is my world, and I will always be there to support and defend her.

Not everyone has the opportunity, or perhaps the choice, to embark on this journey, and I cast no judgement on them. But the idea of giving up on my mother, after all the ways she’s been there for me, is unimaginable. The sleepless nights, the early mornings, the hallucinations, the constant repetition, and the perpetual worry about her well-being are overwhelming. They’re not for everyone. But I am not just anyone — I am a son doing his best for his mother.


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